Saturday, October 17, 2015

Dad's Goodbye

Why was grandpa crying?
My children asked one day.
Cause grandpa knows he's dying, 
was all that I could say.

The tears welled up-
a lump was formed so fast
I couldn't breathe.
For it was then I knew
it wont be long before he leaves.

Suddenly, I flashed back,
to a time when I was four
and he'd lift me up to do the dishes,
 while he would  mop the floor.

It was every Sunday morning
 while the others went to pray 
To surprise my mom when she came home 
that was just his subtle way.

I remember well the extra hug
as he set me on the floor
that's the time I cherished most-
when I was only four.

I thought back to his humor, and the twinkle in his eyes.
That twinkle always made us smile
though  back then, 
I knew not why.

His body now was atrophied,
his  mind was trapped inside.
He couldn't  wipe the tear we saw
 slip smoothly from his eye.

"I don't know what he wants to say"
 mom said, when I walked in;
She flipped through cards with words scrawled out
and was looking rather grim.

I looked at dad, and saw the twinkle-
and said "mom look into his eyes"
he's trying to say "I love you" 
and with that he gave a sigh.

He finally made me understand
 why  those twinkles made us smile.
The twinkle said it clearly-
the understanding took a while.

They were saying that he loved us,
he had said it all along-
We thought he hardly noticed us,
but clearly we were wrong.

I told him that I had to leave-
there were  things I had to do ,
but promised I'd return again
 tomorrow around  noon.

He looked hard into my eyes ,
the  twinkle  was there too
and I responded "Yes, I know dad, 
and we all love you too".

The next day I was nearly ready 
to walk out of my front door;
When suddenly I felt his hug,
Just like when I was four.

The phone then rang-
my brother called to say that he had died
Yes I  know, I said,
 he gave me one last hug-
 to say goodbye.